Finding the right therapist
Updated: Jan 30, 2019
Choosing the right therapist means the same thing as starting any new relationship.
If you have found yourself putting off or delaying therapy in part because you're afraid it's too hard to find the right fit, I would say that this is a lot like looking for a romantic relationship--Good relationships are in fact not "found" but are co-created and may take a little time and effort to develop on both sides. Also it's important to understand that in order to get where we want to go it's necessary to be open to being challenged, while also being supported.
If you know that you are distressed and need help to grow in the direction you desire and can't do it alone, then you are halfway there. The prospect of admitting one's failures and disappointments takes courage and vulnerability, and sometimes it seems easier to just avoid. If you realize however that taking on some risk of being vulnerable is a necessary aspect of change vs. the risk of staying the same, then it's time to start trying out different therapists to see which can work with you to help you achieve that change.
As with most things, it's often getting started that's hardest, but then it's also the sticking with the process even when it isn't easy that pays off in the long run. If you want to try to see if I may be a good fit for you to try, I invite you to call me and set up a consultation. If it turns out I'm not a good fit, don't give up, keep trying--you have nothing to lose except by not trying at all.